When Advising Others
‘Abbaad Ibn ‘Abbaad Al-Khawwaas Ash-Shaamee (d.114h) said:
“Let your attitude be, when finding something you disapprove of in your brothers, as though you are offering help from yourselves to yourselves, and offering sincerity from yourselves to your Lord, and offering sympathy from yourselves to your brothers.
If you do that, then your own faults will be of more concern to you than those of anyone else, and each of you would seek to win over sincere advice from each other. And whoever offers sincere advice to you and submits it from among you, will enjoy your good favours and graces. ‘Umar Ibn Al-Khattaab said concerning this, ‘May Allaah have mercy on the one who brought my faults to my attention.‘
You yourself love to speak and that what you say (to others) should be put up with. But when the like of what you have said, is said to you, you become angry, being angry with the people concerning their traits that you dislike, while you have the like of these traits. Would you then not like that these traits are held against you?!”